Monday, April 4, 2016

Keeping a Man Faithful, How?

While it is so common to hear that men are polygamous by nature, I'd still like to believe that men can be monogamous by choice. It may not be an easy task, but it is possible. Our men would also need a lot of help from us, their women to help keep them on the straight and narrow path. So, how, you might ask?

There are no straight answers, no proven, tried and tested formula to such. We are all different and our situations vary as much as there is variations to language and our lifestyle. However, here are some simple tips that might help you keep your man faithful, appreciate you more, realize what a catch you are and feel stupid should they even entertain the idea of letting you go.

1. Let's fix our attitudes, shall we?

  • Don't fucking nag your man. They don't appreciate the constant questioning, pardon me interrogating. They're not criminals. They're just late in getting home! Traffic sucks in Manila ALL the time.
  • Give them TRUST. Sometimes they do the stupidest of things that we accuse them of, just because we keep on drilling it in their heads. The logic, "I'm not doing anything and you're thinking that way, might as well give you what you're really yapping about."
  • RESPECT. Let's avoid checking on their phones and phone bills now. You can connect the dots of this little tip with the one posted before it.
  • Let their eyes wander! Come on! Ladies, your man appreciates beauty, that's why he's with you. He appreciated YOUR beauty whether it be physical, inside or better yet both. Be glad that they still have clear eyesight. I mean, the moment they say that you're the only beautiful thing in the world, you have got to start wondering if there's something wrong with their brain process, their eyesight or all of the above. Remember that you are still THE MOST beautiful woman in the world in their eyes no matter if they say that the chick who passed by is cute, beautiful or even if she looks like Angelina Jolie!
  • I know that many women can defend and hold themselves all by their freaking lonesome. However, there are times that our men just want to be protective of us. ALLOW them to become the gentleman that they really are. If they want to hold the door open for you, let them. If they want to open the car door for you, smile and thank them. Just don't expect and ask that they do this ALL the time. They still want their women to be independent at times. The trick is, make them feel needed, it helps boost up their sense of self and helps them establish their role as the head of the family.
2. Let's get PHYSICAL

  • Yeah, I don't have a perfect coca-cola body. Dang! I know that. I have flabs, I have scars. Fuck! I have  imperfections. I don't hide them, instead I claim them as part of me. Shit! We have different body types, skin types, blood types and type this or that. Just make sure that you take care of yourself. Comb your hair, brush your teeth, take a bath. Make sure you smell good when he comes home and NOT like cleaning products because you were so busy doing the laundry or cleaning the filthy bathroom the whole day.
  • Try dressing up when you go out. It doesn't matter if it's out for a fancy dinner or just doing the errands. Dress appropriately! Leave the sweat pants in the closet Use them when you go for a run or save it for when you're at the gym or when working out. Using them everyday? Please, don't! They don't do anything except stamp you on the back with - HARASSED MOM/WIFE/GF.
  • Oh, and let's try to avoid the AGE OLD EXCUSE that I've been taking care of the kids, yada, yada, yada. Set aside time for yourself. You NEED to take care of yourself, too.
3. Next up: Do things TOGETHER

  • Bond over the simplest, little things. Go to the spa together, get a massage! Relax!
  • Take up a hobby together, it can include, but is not limited to activities like going to the gun range to shoot some 9mm's or whipping up something in the kitchen.
  • If by any chance you think you're not going to enjoy handling the 9mm, try to show some GENUINE interest in what he wants to do. Learn it. Share knowledge. Aside from making your man feel special, you'll be surprised at the amount of things that you would learn if you would only listen.
  • Have kids? Use the time with them to bond together. You can also set aside some time away from them, go to the movies, have dinner or just walk around in a park like a silly teenage couple. Check bullet #1 under this topic. 
4. Romance and the bedroom

  • First and foremost, define your limits. It's not bad and you won't be shot if you voice out the things that you would do and not do inside the bedroom. It's called compromise!
  • Let's connect the dots to let's get physical. Part of the process in ensuring that you don't look like the cleaning lady who's in desperate need of a break is lingerie. You can be wearing an old duster/house dress when he comes home. But, I suggest that you make sure that you're wearing something special under it. Surprise your man with some lace and/or saved for special occasions bra and panties. It can be an exciting thought and sight for your tired and weary man.
  • It's okay to be a warm vanilla in bed. Let's just try to make sure that we know when to add sprinkles or chocolate fudge when the romance starts. Meaning, don't just lie there and wait for the wham-bam thank you ma'am experience. Work it!
  • It's OKAY to be freaky in bed sometimes. Let the devil in you out once in a while. Mix it with your angelic attitude. You won't go to hell for it. Experiment with things that are comfortable to you. It could be a simple blindfolding or it can be as freaky as total domination in bed. Indulge his fantasies once in a while. 
  • Don't be JUST sexual. Let it be a SENSUAL experience for both of you. Start slow. Lovemaking is good. But, you can always turn it up a notch and let it turn into hot steamy SEX. Or, you can totally let go and have a wild fuck fest with your man. Better yet, combine all three!
  • Wind down after the romance. Cuddle, snuggle with your man. Make him feel special.
5. Be the woman that he loved.

  •  After all these, show him the same person that he fell in love with and add some of these special touches to the repertoire:
  • When he's tired, give him a shoulder rub.
  • Prepare his meals
  • Welcome him home with a smile and preferably with a cold glass of juice/water in your hand.
  • Ask him about his day and LISTEN.
It's possible that I've forgotten so many other things. The list goes on and on. Who says that maintaining a relationship is easy? It takes a lot of hard work, adjustments and compromise. 

By the way, it isn't a one way street. So, on the next installment, I'm gonna have something for the guys as well. 

Oh, and if everything seems to have failed, ladies, it's time to drop the son of a bitch like a sack of hot potatoes. He doesn't deserve you at all. Any thoughts, guys?
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